My name is Erin and I am sending a very hearty welcome to my blog site “TheGrittyBitch.com”! I am excited about my plans for this blog.
I picked the name “The Gritty Bitch” because it describes much about my character and life. The word grit means strength of character, courage and resolve. Other words to define grit are perseverance, passion or an indomitable spirit. Grit allows a person to carry on toward their goal in spite of overwhelming odds or obstacles.
I have lived a life filled with an unbelievable amount of tragedy, trauma and pain. As a young girl I was abused sexually, physically, and emotionally. I was severely bullied in middle school and suffered years under the cloud of depression and insecurity.
At the difficult age of 15 years old, I found my brother dead in his room. Our family would never be the same. Unable to cope with my brother’s death and family illnesses, I attempted suicide. By the time I graduated high school, I was determined to make the most of my life with what I had been given. I wasn’t born gritty, I learned life lessons that helped me develop grit. I learned from the “school of hard knocks” as my Dad would say.
My parents had the ability to send me to college for which I have always been grateful. After graduating, I met and married the love of my life. Together, we built our rather unconventional family. My husband had his son from his first marriage, with whom I fell madly in love. I was a mom, if only part-time. We spent years facing infertility treatments in order to add to our family. I miscarried all my pregnancies except one. Our daughter was born at 22 weeks when I contracted a life threatening infection. She died quietly in our arms soon after birth.
We eventually adopted twin baby girls from the British Virgin Islands. Although we are Caucasian, our beautiful daughters are black. Soon we were faced with parenting babies with multiple illness, learning and developmental challenges as well as severe behavioral challenges. While the girls were growing, we were confronted with helping my mother while her health declined from Alzheimer’s Disease. During these years, at any one given time, one or both girls were in trouble at school and eventually the law. Our children are now grown and have families of their own.
Shortly after Mom died, I developed breast cancer and my husband started having heart problems. One serious illness or injury followed another to the extent that my friends are still asking “How much more can you take?”
During these years, I learned to persevere and love. I developed a personal core belief that life is a gift and even in some of the most challenging days of our lives, we can be grateful and hopeful of the gift itself. I learned to use humor as a source of healing and coping. I learned to take care of myself and my family physically, emotionally and spiritually. I have hope for the future of my children and grandchildren.
In our own search for help we found resources are sadly lacking in the USA for people or families struggling with chronic or severe illnesses, mental illness, out of control children, people suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or other horrible life circumstances. My husband and I faced many lonely days and long nights with no one to lean on. There are no support groups for families with violent children. Who would want to advertise that difficulty in a public forum when parent shaming and blaming is a rampant part of social media?
It is my desire to help people in need by writing about our experiences, what works for us and what does not work. This blog site is to be a support group and a place to feel safe from the harsh judgements of people who have no idea what you are facing. I want you to understand that you are not alone in your circumstances.
I invite you to subscribe to “thegrittybitch.com” to receive blog posts in your in box. As a subscriber you will receive a free copy of my article “You are Superhuman”. Subscribe using the link below.
